apprehension

We can't know everything that she did, but I can assure you it was a great deal...we are mysterious creatures, aren't we? and at the end much of it turns out not to matter... ~Evening (the movie) I've been thinking a great deal lately about so many things; so many things that seem not to matter in the grand scheme of the great big world in which I am only a small, insignificant part. It's quite sobering, really, to realize that each one of us is merely a blip on the radar; given that you believe in an all seeing & knowing being that oversees the universe. It's sobering and freeing and parallelizing all in the same movement; movement because it's not static but an ever flowing span of thought, liquid in it's ability to absorb free radicals and penetrate the soft, quiet moments of time. How many of us have the ability to be alone with ourselves, really truly alone with ourselves, listening in the quiet to what our bodies have to say? Do you really know...

Between the idea And the reality Between the motion And the act Falls the Shadow… — T.S. Eliot, “The Hollow Men”

Two purple twos; blood blister, shifting shades at each inspection & bruised nail-bed \ competing for my attention. Knees and hips cry out - should I try to move; indecision (for) over a desired resting position. Aching elbows, this is a first - a new kind of pain/ a welcome distraction from the old Sleep (comes) descends swiftly; not an unwelcome (visitor) guest but a surprise all the same.

By the sheerest places on your mountain The depth is above as well as below us; The silence roars in waves; I assume the mercy and the memory of shores —even when there is no sea. —from G.M.F by Stephen Philbrick

these are multiple shadows because there were a lot of things she walked away from without a word of explanation when she was younger & she still thinks about them more than she needs to ~multiple shadows

There are times I think I'm doing things on principle, but mostly I just do what feels good. But that's a principle, too. ~Principles

You're the strangest person I ever met, she said & I said you too & we decided we'd know each other a long time. ~Kindred Spirits, storypeople.com Some day I will find someone that will be just as strange as myself and we will live happily ever after - but for now I am going to enjoy being as stange as strange can be.... "Everything has it's beauty, but not everyone sees it" ~Confucius

Voices from the first dark heartshaped green of summer leaves, rain; birds'. What are they called. I'm leaving here, and still don't know. I'm going there, though, where they are- I feel this. Feel that I was there before. I felt this as a child, and now I know it. ~June Storm, Franz Wright

I once had a garden filled with flowers that grew only on dark thoughts but they need constant attention & one day I decided I had better things to do.

Encased in a cloud of white, I slowly make my way up the winding hill. The air is crisp and fresh, not the heavy, dank smog that pollutes the city streets. In my car I am invincible and therefore I am able to ascend without a seconds pause. The mystery behind fog and all things associated with it have always astounded me. Looking out across a field blanketed in white, unable to see the ground but knowing it is there, creating an illusion of floating amidst immortals. I am growing stronger, opening doors and opportunities once believed to be distant dreams. Our futures are like fog; mysterious and often times concealing that which is important. I fall down and I get up…that’s what I am accustomed to. Life is an uphill battle and should be treated as such. Fortunately, I’ve got Dizzy by my side and the road is wide open.

As I look out to the night sky I see my faithful companion, Orion. Many years ago I was fascinated by this constellation. I remember sitting glued to the telly one afternoon as a man, with a monotonous voice, informed viewers of how the ancient Egyptians built the great pyramids in the likeness of Orion. Well, let me tell you, I was hooked; anything to do with the Egyptians definitely had my attention and approval. As the years progressed I would always look to the night sky for this old friend. Orion was a hunter, according to Greek mythology, he was killed by his love when she was challenged to strike a specific point in the ocean; not knowing it was Orion swimming, she flung a single arrow, striking him dead. Another version depicts Orion as a hunter who was stung by a scorpion while hunting. In both stories, Orion was denied the love of Metrope, which broke his heart. Regardless, he remains the mightiest hunter in the night sky. Each night while walking to or from the car, ...

do you ever wonder why upon entering an elevator, people push the button for the floor upon which they wish to go to regardless of the fact that the button has already been pushed and is lit up? is it a self conscious action? has the action already started before it registers that they don't have to press the button again?